A Story From A Friend.

God's desperation

I was praying a few months back that God would begin to break my heart with what breaks His. I felt so far removed from that burden because truthfully, I was apathetic to the thoughts and ways of God. I asked Him for the ability to love the unloved, the broken, the unsuspecting, and the doubting. He pointed inward, straight at myself. Use your doubts, fears, and failures to begin to know how to love others, Liz. I had to start from the inside.

What would God love and value about me? It meant changing my belief system. It meant changing the lies and exchanging it for beautiful truth with every thought that ran through my head. Scripture tells us to take EVERY thought captive and to think on what is good, pleasing, and perfect. It is SO hard to do those things; but, I don't regret any of this time of purifying. It hurts. It aches. And it is raw and beautiful.I asked God to give me a heart from the homeless. I don't know why that word was placed so deeply ingrained within my heart but it was. I had a vision of people so broken and cast aside...of men and women whose names I do not know but their eyes questioning and pleading for Truth that saves haunts me.

I asked God for the ability to love the homeless, to remove my prejudices that lay dormant. He showed me a man in my town named Reggie with beautiful eyes that sparkle with a hope that I did not yet know. His hands are scarred. His flannel shirt is faded. His southern accent speaks music to the heart of God because he knows what it is to want, fear, and need to hide in the cleft of the rock. Jesus is HIS Rock. Reggie and I shared a meal of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and talked about love, faith, and the fact that we're both broken. I gave Reggie what I had in my wallet, but he gave me something so much deeper and more intimate. I hugged him and felt his shoulders shake. He said, "You're just a little girl. You don't know what I've done and you don't know how long it's been since I've had a hug." Tears poured down my face when he said that. "You're just a little girl and your heart is beautiful."Gently, I put my hand on his face, and said, "Reggie, I'm the little girl that Jesus commanded to arise from that room of death. You're the man outside of the gate called Beautiful, rise up and walk, friend."

I haven't seen Reggie again after our last peanut butter and jelly meal. But he changed my heart and my life. I feel like I met an angel who dared me to wrestle with him. Not to wrestle in the physical sense, but in the cultural and emotional realms where I've been taught to avoid the eyes of those I do not know, to judge immediately, to cast blame and suspicion. I walked away with a limp. I realized my blindness. He is beautiful and so very loved.

If I do nothing significant for the rest of my life career-wise, I want to hug people.That said, on May 28th, I am moving to Denver to intern at the Denver Rescue Mission. This mission feeds, clothes, loves, and educates the people of Denver. But they also take the time to look at the hearts of those so desperately hurt and desire to see them transformed with the love and power of God. Only God can produce heart-change, not man.

Is that not just an amazing story told by a young girl just totally annointed by the Holy Spirit. I asked Liz for permission to post her story on my blog because it is so evident that she has been blessed. Thank You Jesus for allowing us to be your hands and feet.